Everyone fears changes…
Our brain naturally rejects everything that is new, uncommon, unusual.
Why is that?
It’s because we are lazy. Once we get used to a situation, it is extremely hard to get out of our comfort zone. Ideally, we should never leave it again.
But hey, is that even possible? Do we live in a stable world? Are we sure we are never going to lose our job / boyfriend / perfect body (you name it)?
Panta Rhei. I believe realizing the fact that we live in a constantly changing environment could help us be more flexible and less sticky to what we currently have.
I recall we once had a stable life with my family. My dad had a well paid job, we could afford a nice family car, I had a pleasure to attend private English lessons while being a kid. Nobody thought our life could have been different.
One of my friends was married once but she divorced. One of my friends had a perfect job in a beautiful corporation. And she was happy there. Not anymore, trying to quit. One of my friends was rich but lost it all. One of my friends always wanted to stay single, she is getting married now. One of my friends never thought of having kids, she is pregnant now. And scared. One of my friends never believed in God, started to believe some time ago. One of my friends worked as an analyst. Just like the other 1000 in the same building. Never believed that she could make a difference and change the world. She is working on an awesome project now. Something that will surely change some people’s minds.
It could also be YOU. Am I right?
Why are we scared of changes? Why is it so hard to stop / start / push doing things? What stops us from being happy, from changing our reality? Is it the lack of confidence? Or lack of motivation? Or is it the fear of failure?
It could be a combo, one might say.
From my own observations it seems people:
- underestimate themselves – they don’t believe in their potential
- fear failure
- prefer to be in a situation they got used to because it is already KNOWN and the known situation is better than the new one (the new might be worse! so it’s better not to try to find it out!)
- lack motivation.
The good news is all of the above can be changed. You can easily change your perception by analyzing your strengths and weaknesses, benefits and losses of your actions, opportunities and threats… I bet you all have heard about the SWOT analysis so it is no secret how that works. The questions is: have you ever done it? have you ever listed out all your SWOTs? No, but seriously! It may sound trivial but I realized the power of the written word once I did mine a couple of weeks ago. Moreover, I had it recited to some random person. And you know what? It felt weird! I felt I was doing something wrong when I was talking out loud about my strengths. Luckily, I realized there was nothing wrong in telling other people the good things about self. Try it out. It’s not an easy exercise though 😉
Should you hesitate how a change could impact your life, list out all the possible outcomes (whether positive or negative). Think about the best and worst case scenario. Is the worst case scenario really that bad? Maybe it’s not… Do you think it will really occur? Ask family, friends, random people about their feedback. Maybe it is just your mind’s projection. Or else… “if it scares you, it might be a good thing to try”, as Seth Godin says 😉
Ask yourself what you will gain from the change. But think as well about what you will loose. Loosing something you don’t want to loose may be the thing that stops you from pursuing your dream. It may be the key to understanding your lack of motivation.
If this fails, try to find a coach. There are many out there willing to help. They work with people who are scared, demotivated, bored… A good coach will dig your potential out of you.
Because if not now, when? 🙂
Questions? Comments? Feedback? Need help? Drop me a line 🙂